In an attempt to get myself off of Facebook, I’m taking a lot of things off my profile, my list of quotes being one of them. However, they are too good not to have immortalized somewhere on the internet, so here they are, and here they shall remain…
– – –
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, to give you a hope and a future.” (Jer. 29:11)
God says forgiveness is divine! Or was that Snoop Dogg? –Patrick
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit. –Psalms 34:18
I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else. –C.S. Lewis
You put that on your Myface page? –My dad
How many seniors does it take to seduce a tiger? –Reedo
My life is a musical. I just don’t sing in it. –Natasha
Would you want to clarify a salad? –Dr. Reynolds
I thought you said you had herpes on your vocal chords… –Chris
That movie was so good I forgot I was in college! –Seth
Wait, so wrestling with God was like, a male bonding thing? –Seth
How are these similar? (Holds up a pen and a cup) They’re both plastic, they’re both cylindrical, they’re both being held by a dashing professor… you’re laughing again… –Dr. Spears
Good evening, gentlemen! I’m plastered. –Alcibiades
Don’t make me use expletives! –Kevin
The LORD will fight for you, and you have only to be silent. –Exodus 14:14
Greg! Make that pizza look SEXY! –Me
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn’t the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment. -–Robert Benchley
Corey VanHuystee feels all warm and fuzzy inside… like he just swallowed a kitten. –Corey’s status
But I don’t look at people’s butts, I just touch them! –Katie Winters
The main dangers in this life are the people who want to change everything… or nothing. –Lady Astor
Trevor: Bethany, are your eyes brown? Me: Well, it doesn’t matter because I’m not dating you!
My body is attracted to you but I am not! –Mudge
There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased that line and replaced it with a small trout.
The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace. (Leviticus 6:24-26)
I really want to start an IV on you right now! –Chris
Corey: The Nicene Creed is like, THE key document of Christianity!
Me: Oh, I always thought that was the Bible.
Me (in lots of back pain): I want to be a snake so I wouldn’t have a backbone. Kevin: Snakes do have backbones, actually. You could be an octopus, though.
Me: Okay then, I’ll be an octopus.
Chris: I…. will NOT… date an octopus…
Our mind is not impervious to suggestions from the will or emotions. -C.S. Lewis
I’m a really deep guy… with lots of depth… –Chris
God is not intimidated by our weaknesses. — Pastor Al
You should start a sexy train. –Chris
They had… fourtuplets? –my mom (she meant quadruplets)