I have the anti-Midas touch

Allow me to share three anecdotes from yesterday:

  1. I stopped at Chipotle for lunch on my way to my internship. When I got back into the car, I stuck the key into the ignition and turned it the same as I have every time I’ve ever been in a car in the last 5-and-a-half years, but instead of giving any resistance, the whole thing spun around freely. The battery turned on, but not the gas. That wouldn’t have been so much of a problem if the battery would have turned off, but no such luck. The car ended up getting towed, and it turns out something in the steering column had decided to break.
  2. About 20 minutes before leaving work, I noticed there was a trickle of water making its way down the side of my cubicle from behind the cabinet. I opened the cabinet to find that the water bottle I’d left in my purse was not quite closed, and everything in the purse (which is leather, by the way) was swimming in a good inch-and-a-half of water. Soggy notebook, waterlogged flash drive… thank goodness my cell phone wasn’t in there at the time.
  3. In an attempt to be helpful, I put soap in the dishwasher and started it. It was liquid soap, though… And although it was labeled “dishwashing soap,” I failed to realize that it was for washing dishes by hand, not in a washer. The following picture leaves no need for further explanation.

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I have the anti-Midas touch

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